Here’s a look at the top 20 drivers (based on last year’s final standings) and what they might be thinking – in exactly 10 words – as the calendar changes to 2013.
Brad Keselowski: “Tastes great. Less filling. Either way, I’m going for two!”
Clint Bowyer: “I’m out to prove that last year wasn’t a fluke.”
Jimmie Johnson: “Wait, it’s been two years already? I’m done fooling around.”
Kasey Kahne: “Dale. Jimmie. Jeff. This is going to be my year.”
Greg Biffle: “Time to step on the throttle for all 36 races.”
Denny Hamlin: “I need to start calling my shots before every race”
Matt Kenseth: “New team. New owner. New teammates. New car. Same Matt.”
Kevin Harvick: “I’m still unsure how I made the Chase last year.”
Tony Stewart: “Trucks at Eldora. Danica in Cup. This will be great!”
Jeff Gordon: “Dear everyone, sorry for trying to stick up for myself.”
Martin Truex Jr.: “The Chase was fun, but I want to win more!”
Dale Earnhardt Jr.: “See ya, Car of Tomorrow. It’s been real … really disappointing.”
Kyle Busch: “Wait, explain this again. Brad won the title before me?”
Ryan Newman: “One more year with Stewart-Haas. Time to step up.”
Carl Edwards: “I enjoyed my vacation last year. Now, back to work.”
Paul Menard: “Time to make a run at the Chase. No, seriously.”
Joey Logano: “New team. New owner. New teammates. New car. Different Joey.”
Marcos Ambrose: “So, I’m thinking 34 road races and two ovals. Thoughts?.”
Jeff Burton: “I am sincerely considering Jerry Gappens for my campaign manager.”
Jamie McMurray: “Ah, 2010. Remember when I won three races that year?.”
*Danica Patrick: “This is it. Time to prove that I belong here.”
*First full season in the Sprint Cup Series
The thoughts and quotes above were written satirically and are not intended to be taken literally or seriously.



